Greetings to my single follower! I have tried and failed to find something worth saying about my Well-Respected Nursing Program tonight, so here is a vaguely amusing anecdote.
My favorite professor likes to say she has "Part-timer's" (as opposed to Alzheimer's): those Really Dumb Things everybody does that are "senior moments" in anyone over fifty or so and "blonde moments" in anyone under that (apologies to the blonde community for the expression; I am not blonde myself but assume the stereotype is probably tiresome). Examples include coming home from errands without the one thing you went for, looking for your reading glasses when they are perched on your head, and putting the cereal in the fridge but the eggs in the pantry.
My father is a purveyor of particularly fine part-timer's moments, not because he is old (which he is not) or blonde (also not), but mainly because by the time one reaches their mid-fifties they have usually amassed enough information and experience to crowd out things like "I should buy salt." Sometimes, though, he asks me something that makes me wonder if I have suddenly appeared in an alternate reality.
The most recent disruption of the space-time continuum was when he bought contact lens solution for me at the local big-box store, even though I had Lasik a year ago (the proper response in this case, for anyone who loves their Daddy, is "thank you for thinking of me," and then everyone can have a good laugh about the whole thing). The best alternate universe moment, however, was during a car ride in which the radio treated us to "You Give Love a Bad Name." After the DJ did his bit, my dad, very puzzled, says,
"Bon Jovi is a man?"
Interdimensional travel is now imminent, I can tell. "Sure, he's a man, why?"
"I thought Bon Jovi was a band!"
Aaaand now I am firmly established in the Mirror Universe, while explaining that the band Bon Jovi is led by a man named Jon Bon Jovi. My dad does two things with this information. First, he tells me that Bon Jovi is a silly name for a person (I didn't break it to him about Englebert Humperdinck), and secondly, upon arriving home, he announces to my stepmom that Bon Jovi is a person. Her response? "Really? I thought it was a band!"
I'll send for my things as soon as I've gotten settled here in Oz.
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